Tuesday, June 1, 2010

A Decision

Today is June 1. Summer has arrived.

I can remember summers growing up. I usually spent at least one week at Mid-South Youth Camp - the church camp run by Freed-Hardeman. It was a great week of fun, sun, and spiritual growth. At the end of the week, I always felt that "spiritual high" that you often get at camp, revivals, youth rallies, workshops, etc. But after a week or two, sometimes even a day or two back home, that "high" was gone, and life went back to the way it was before.

My life has drastically changed since coming to China. Not outwardly so that you would notice right away, but I think if you spent a little time with me, you would be able to tell the difference. When you are living away from the life that you know and are comfortable with, and more importantly living with focus and purpose, you can't help but feel that "spiritual high" or a feeling of being on fire for Him. About a week ago, I was laying in bed thinking about going home. Our group here often talks about how nervous we are about going home. Although finding jobs and places to live is a big part of that, most of it stems from our finding a new Family to become a part of and a continued since of purpose. Will the changes that have taken place within us keep us from fitting in? If so, maybe that's a good thing? Anyway, I was lying awake thinking about all of this and about how I hope I am able to keep this fire when I go back home - that I won't just slip back into a life of habit and comfort.

Then it hit me. One of the greatest lessons my parents ever taught me is that love is a decision. When you marry, you don't always feel "in love" but you make a decision to love each other no matter what. When you have to be around someone that you have personality clashes with, you have to make the decision to love them as we are commanded to do. In the same way, being on fire is a decision. If we do not consciously decide to be on fire for our Father, we will fall into a lifestyle of being lukewarm. And from reading Revelation, we know that He considers that disgusting. But, if we wake up every morning and decide that today we will live for Him, and we decide throughout the day to speak with Him and seek Him, and we live with a purpose of turning every conversation that we have with others so that it is about Him, we can't help but be lit on fire.

So, as our time here in China nears its end and I think about going home, I'm no longer going to say that I hope that I'll keep this zeal. I won't say that I'm going to try. I am deciding right here and now that I will live each day with Him and for Him, and that all that I do will be with Him in mind.


  1. Reading your post takes me back to when I was coming back to the States after living 16 months with my husband in Poland. I was so excited to come home, and yet I knew that we had just had a life-changing experience in another country. We returned in 1998 and life sped up dramatically (as it tends to do in the US). I wish I'd had a place to blog, reflect, and memorialize our time there. It was spectacular and an experience I wish every American could have.

  2. miss and love you Kris. I can only partially know what you are feeling considering I haven't ever been to China :) but I will be praying for you and Michael as you make your transition back. Hope to see you sometime!

  3. Kris, your comments are so true! Choosing daily to hear from Papa and then to obey is so critical. This always gives us new material to say, "Yesterday I learned something new about..." Learning, living and sharing keep us open to "on fire" experiences.


  4. Great post! Can't wait to see you.