Start to Finish

Coming home was a bit of a nightmare. But it's been a week and a half, so I think I can talk about it now.

The school that Michael and I taught for only allotted us a specific amount of money for our airline tickets home, so we had to find the cheapest flight possible. That happened to be China Eastern Airlines. This was a bit of a risky move considering that we were going to be on that plane for 12 hours, but we didn't have much of a choice, so we tried to be optimistic.

We got to the airport several hours before our flight. After some drama, including going to the wrong terminal (I guess we were wrong to assume that a flight to LA would be in the international terminal), having to change gates 3 times, and waiting in line to board for about an hour, we finally boarded the plane. We got settled in and waited for take-off, and waited, and waited... After another half hour or so sitting on the tarmac, we find out that our flight is being delayed due to "bad weather." We looked out the window - it wasn't even raining; in fact, it wasn't even cloudy. I had already taken my Dramamine, so I fell asleep and completely missed take-off.

The 12-hour flight was as to be expected. After sleeping as long as I could, then reading as long as I could, then watching movies as long as I could, I looked at the clock and we still had 2 hours to go.

We were so excited to be back on US soil. We were completely beside ourselves to see signs that we could actually read, to see other Americans, and even to hear people speaking Spanish. We made it through immigration without a hitch. Then we had to pick up our luggage to go through customs. Again, China Eastern made us wait, and wait, and wait. When we started waiting for the bags, we had 1 hour to make it to our connecting flight (we were supposed to have a 3-hour layover). We got our suitcases, loaded our carts and took off at a run for customs. They let us through quickly and we sprinted out of the international terminal and to the domestic terminal. We found an American Airlines agent to help us - we had 30 minutes before the flight was scheduled to leave. She informed us that we were 15 minutes late. Your suitcases have to be checked 45 minutes before scheduled departure. That's when the crying started.

Missing the flight might not have been so bad - after all, it's LA and they have lots of flights going to Dallas everyday - but another American Airlines flight to Dallas had been canceled. So a full flight of passengers had to be put on standby for the remaining flights to DFW. We waited in a ticketing line for 2 hours to find out that all the flights were overbooked and the best she could do was put us on stand-by. By this time I was crying so hard that the poor airline agent gave us "stand-by priority." But that doesn't mean much when there are 65 people on the stand-by list.

So we went to the gate for the next flight out, sat on the floor and prayed for them to call our names. They didn't. We used a pay phone to call my mom. She said to keep praying, then she made some phone calls and had a whole bunch of other people praying for us as well. We made a trek to the gate for the next flight out. As the line of boarding passengers dwindled to nothing, they started calling names for standby's. We were numbers 3 and 4. Numbers 1 and 2 didn't show up. More tears - this time they were tears of joy.

After all that, we finally made it home. I was so happy, I hardly even noticed that we were 4 hours later than we were supposed to be.

While we were sitting in the airport, praying desperately to get home, I asked Michael why I could ask for something so desperately of my Father and He wouldn't give it to me. Wasn't there a verse about that? 1 John 3:22 says, "and whatever we ask we receive from him, because we keep his commandments and do what pleases him." Hadn't we been spending the past year keeping His commandments and doing what pleased Him?

I doubted Him. After all that He had done, after all that He had gotten me through, I doubted Him.

I am so thankful that I have people in my life who keep faith even in difficult times. And looking back, I'm so thankful for those few hours of testing that I received in the Los Angeles airport.

My focus had been lacking over those last few days in China. I was so consumed with going "home," that I had forgotten that my life is God's and that there is no shifting of the wind that He does not have a hand in. I relied on myself to get me "home." I needed a reminder that I NEED Him, even when I'm going home.

He took me to China. He protected, supported, and held me up while we were there, and He brought me safely home. He was there from Start to Finish. And He is still here. And He will always be here.

Reflections

All my bags are packed; I'm ready to go.

The van comes to pick us up in less than 2 hours, and we will say goodbye to Hangzhou, our home for the past year. And what a year it has been.

It was not at all what I expected.

I expected to teach, but instead I learned. I expected to reach out, but instead I reached up. I expected to grow, but instead I grew up.

Above all, I feel this has been a year of learning and growing. Maybe God wanted me in China, not so that I could teach others, but so that He and they could teach me. I have learned a lot about myself. I have learned a lot of my faults and short-comings. But more than that, I have begun to learn how to turn them over to the Father, and allow Him to change me for His glory.

I expected to reach people with the Good News. But instead I have learned to let Him Work through me, and to let go and allow Him to bring the increase in His own time and for His own glory. He has taught me over and over to rely on Him. And He has taught me the meaning of His words in 1 Corinthians 15:58

Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourself fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

Although I still have a long way to go, I have grown more than I can even recount. But more than that, I have grown closer to Michael. I have grown closer to my family and true friends. And I have grown closer to my Father.

He has been so good to us. He has been with us every step of the way. He has picked us up when we have fallen. He has blessed us beyond measure. He has led us and protected us and held us in a way that I have never felt before. Thank you, Father, for your steadfast love. I cannot express it in words, but you know what I am saying in my heart.

And to all of you, I want to say thank you. Thank you for reading. Thank you for your encouraging comments. Thank you most of all for your prayers. They got us through some dark and despairing days, and they helped us rejoice even more on some beautiful and joyful days. May He bless us all as we continue to find ways to Obey and Serve.

Survey Trip

We just got back a few days ago from our survey trip. So much happened - there is really too much to tell. Suffice it to say, we learned a lot about each other, ourselves, and the places where we are looking to live. You can follow how things went with these pictures:

After a very long and stressful stay at the airport, we were finally able to fly out of China and meet up with our team. Our first stop was Phnom Penh, Cambodia.

Part of the Grand Palace in PP.

We were all very happy to be together again after nearly a year of seperation. Here we are riding together in a tuk tuk.

Gavin, Lauren & Jen

Kris, Michael & Aarek

As most countries in SouthEast Asia, Cambodia is predominately Buddhist.

Monks making the commute to their studies.

We stopped by Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum - this is where victims of the Khmer Rouge genocide were imprisoned and tortured.

A hallway in Tuol Sleng leading to the cells where prisoners were kept & tortured.

The Khmer Rouge photographed all the prisoners that they put to death. The rooms are filled with their pictures.

After enjoying a few days in Phnom Penh and spending some time with Andrew & Natalie Hayes - Workers in that city - we took an interesting bus ride to Siem Reap, Cambodia.

A village in the countryside we passed along the way.

The boys sampled some of the local delicacy - fried crickets.

After various other adventures that evening (including Aarek singing karaoke, frog hunting, and spider sightings), we settled down in our thatched hut for a few short hours of sleep. The next morning, we awoke at 4:30 to make the 30 minute commute to Angkor Wat in time for sunrise.

We spent the rest of the morning touring Angkor Wat and the other two major ancient temples, Angkor Thom & the Bayon Temple.

After our morning of exploring the temples, we hopped on another airplane and headed for Luong Probang, Laos.

Yet another tuk tuk. We are so excited to be in Laos!

We rented bikes and rode out through the hills to see some of the more rural areas.

We had a wonderful trip. Thanks so much for your thoughts, prayers, and encouragement. We are planning to make a decision on our launch city by January 2011. Please continue to Ask that He leads us where He wants us to go, that He opens doors to allow us to work in that place, and that He begins to prepare us and the people of that place for the time we will be together.

A Decision

Today is June 1. Summer has arrived.

I can remember summers growing up. I usually spent at least one week at Mid-South Youth Camp - the church camp run by Freed-Hardeman. It was a great week of fun, sun, and spiritual growth. At the end of the week, I always felt that "spiritual high" that you often get at camp, revivals, youth rallies, workshops, etc. But after a week or two, sometimes even a day or two back home, that "high" was gone, and life went back to the way it was before.

My life has drastically changed since coming to China. Not outwardly so that you would notice right away, but I think if you spent a little time with me, you would be able to tell the difference. When you are living away from the life that you know and are comfortable with, and more importantly living with focus and purpose, you can't help but feel that "spiritual high" or a feeling of being on fire for Him. About a week ago, I was laying in bed thinking about going home. Our group here often talks about how nervous we are about going home. Although finding jobs and places to live is a big part of that, most of it stems from our finding a new Family to become a part of and a continued since of purpose. Will the changes that have taken place within us keep us from fitting in? If so, maybe that's a good thing? Anyway, I was lying awake thinking about all of this and about how I hope I am able to keep this fire when I go back home - that I won't just slip back into a life of habit and comfort.

Then it hit me. One of the greatest lessons my parents ever taught me is that love is a decision. When you marry, you don't always feel "in love" but you make a decision to love each other no matter what. When you have to be around someone that you have personality clashes with, you have to make the decision to love them as we are commanded to do. In the same way, being on fire is a decision. If we do not consciously decide to be on fire for our Father, we will fall into a lifestyle of being lukewarm. And from reading Revelation, we know that He considers that disgusting. But, if we wake up every morning and decide that today we will live for Him, and we decide throughout the day to speak with Him and seek Him, and we live with a purpose of turning every conversation that we have with others so that it is about Him, we can't help but be lit on fire.

So, as our time here in China nears its end and I think about going home, I'm no longer going to say that I hope that I'll keep this zeal. I won't say that I'm going to try. I am deciding right here and now that I will live each day with Him and for Him, and that all that I do will be with Him in mind.

Our Team

Most of you probably already know that Michael and I are on a long-term team. We have been together for about 4 years now. Our projected launch date is January 2014 and we plan to move somewhere in SouthEast Asia. There are 6 of us on the team. If you don't already know them, please allow me to introduce them to you.

Gavin & Lauren Pinkston

Gavin was Michael's best friend growing up and through college - also the best man in our wedding. He graduated from Freed-Hardeman with a double major in Missions and Pre-Med. He will graduate this weekend from medical school (in Memphis) and will soon begin his residency in Greenwood (or ville...can't remember which), South Carolina. Lauren is his beautiful bride of one year. She also graduated from Freed, with a degree in education. She has been a teacher in Memphis (quite a challenging job) for the past year, and I think has plans to get her Master's in Education when they get to SC.

Aarek & Jen Farmer

Aarek was one of Michael's closest friends in college. He graduated from Freed with a degree in education, and up until recently has been working as a teacher (also in Memphis). He recently accepted a position as Youth Minister for the Great Oaks church of Christ in Cordova. Jen graduated from Florida Southern and is now almost finished with a Master's in Counseling from Harding Grad. They plan to be in Memphis until we move overseas.

and here's a pic of Michael and me...

Gavin has a small window of opportunity between finishing med school and starting his residency, and we decided to use it for a survey trip - a chance to check out some of the countries we are looking into and seeing if we are being Guided anywhere.

But, when people are trying to Reach the Lost, it is never as simple as it sounds. The Enemy has been doing all he can to keep us from going on this trip. From problems with our school here in China to political problems in Thailand to problems booking flights, suffice it to say, we have been fighting a battle. But the One in charge is taking care of us, and we WILL be going on this trip! The four members of the team who are living in the States will be landing in Vietnam on May 31. Michael and I will meet them in Phnom Phen , Cambodia on June 6. In addition to Vietnam and Cambodia, we will also be visiting Laos.

We are so excited to enter this new phase with our team. Our launch date is approaching a lot faster than we thought it would, but we are ready to begin a Good Work!

Please Think of us as we prepare for and go on our trip. Please Ask that we will be Guided to where He wants us to be. This will most likely be our only chance to visit these countries before making a decision on where we will be living in the future. Please Ask that He grants us Wisdom to know His Will.

Thank you for your continued Thoughts for us and our work here in China!

Putting a Face to the Name

Some of you receive newsletters or updates from us occasionally that ask for your Thoughts for some of the students we have made relationships with. (If you haven't, I'm asking you now!) I would like for you to have a face in mind when you are Thinking of these precious students. I will introduce them below.

DREAM

(Dream is seated on the front row, farthest to the right - black long-sleeves)

Dream is my sweet friend that I mentioned in my last blog (if you missed it, check it out here...or just scroll down!). She is a freshman English major. She wants to be an English teacher. She is one of the most thoughtful students I have. Last semester, she was the first to reach out to me and make an effort to form a relationship. We have had many talks recently about Important Things, and she has noticed the difference that They have made in my life. She has shown an interest in the Son and last week, I gave her a Book that was in English and Chinese. The Seed has been sown. Please Ask that it will be Watered and He will give increase. I want so badly for her to know the Truth.

LISA

(Lisa is closest to the camera

- stripes and pointing a gun at you!)

Lisa is a close friend of Dream's. She usually comes to lunch with us on Fridays. She is also a freshman English major. She has not necessarily shown as much interest, but she has been there to hear mention of the Son. She is a sweet girl that loves life. Please Ask that her ears are open to what she has heard, and that her heart will be soil for planting.

CHEN SHU (pronounced Chin Shoe)

(Chen Shu is seated in the middle)

Michael first met Chen Shu last semester. He was by himself, walking back to our campus. It started raining and he didn't have an umbrella. Chen Shu came up to him and offered to walk him home with her umbrella before she even knew that they were heading to the same place. That's just the kind of girl she is. She is a junior Broadcasting major. We have gotten to spend quite a bit of time with her this semester. We have had lunch together, she has been to our apartment to teach us to cook Chinese dishes, and she invited us to be a part of her class project (we had to be on a TV game show of which she was the hostess). Please Ask that her eyes will be open to notice something Different about us, that we will have opportunity to talk to her about Why we are different, and that we have at the very least made an impression in her life for Good and Truth.

WENDY

I think this one is fairly obvious!

Wendy is another one of my freshmen English majors. I had the opportunity to spend a Saturday afternoon with her a couple of weeks ago. We were able to talk for a couple of hours and really got to know each other. Without any prompting from me, Wendy asked me what I Believed. I was, of course very happy to share with her. In response, she told me that she "believes in science" (something they are encouraged to do in this society). She has such a good heart. Please Ask that she will open her heart to search for Something More and that the Words I spoke to her will land in good soil.

Of course there are other students that I have formed relationships with (one of which is Vivian - but I don't have a picture of her yet!). Please Think of all of them, but especially name these precious souls by name. Thank you for your continued Thoughts for the Work here. May His will be done and His name honored!

There Is A War Being Waged

*Disclaimer: I did not write this to offend. I wrote it to make you aware. There are also some generalizations in here that most definitely do NOT apply to everyone I know back home. I wrote this from my heart.

Dream is the student that I have grown the closest to over the past year. We have been talking and spending a lot of time together lately. We have lunch together every Friday. Last Friday, after lunch, we took a walk and ended up talking for around 3 hours.

Dream's family is Buddhist. As a part of Buddhist and Chinese culture, she prays to her ancestors. Dead people. She asks them for blessings, good health, and success in life. Her prayers fall on deaf, dead ears.

My heart breaks.

I love her. I want so badly for her to know the Truth - for her to be able to lean on a Living Rock, for her to be able to speak to Someone who hears.

There is a war being waged. I am a soldier. I am fighting. I have been wounded. I do not ask for an award, or for recognition. All the award and recognition that I need and desire come to me readily from the One who sent me into this battle.

But as my heart breaks for Dream, my heart also breaks for others - for so many of my "Christian" friends back home. They are living in their nice two-story homes, buying new furniture and clothes, going out to eat at expensive restaurants, working hard every day at jobs that will not last past this life, going to "church" on Sundays and Wednesdays and thinking this is Life. They do not even know about the war. They say that they are needed at home to work and support those who go, and also to reach the lost in their own communities. But where is the support? Where is the reaching out to the lost? They do not know there is a war, because they are not fighting in it.

I pray that when Michael and I move back to the States in less than two months, that we will not sink into lives of comfort and forget about the war and those who are fighting in it.

I have a friend who is in the army. He is in the Middle East now. He receives many packages from home and many messages of encouragement. I cannot help but think that the battle that I am fighting in is so much more important. Like I said before, I do not need award or recognition. I just want those back home to realize that there is a war being fought for souls - souls who are dying everyday without ever even hearing the name of their Savior, souls that are praying to dead people who cannot hear them.

When will we wake up and realize that we were not put on the earth and given the Truth so that we could live lives of comfort and mediocrity. We have been called to fight!!!

From prayer that asks that I may be

Sheltered from winds that beat on Thee,

From fearing when I should aspire,

From faltering when I should climb higher,

From silken self, O Captain, free

Thy soldier who would follow Thee.

From subtle love of softening things,

From easy choices, weakenings,

(Not thus are spirits fortified,

Not this way went the Crucified,)

From all that dims Thy Calvary,

O Lamb of God, deliver me.

Give me the love that leads the way,

The faith that nothing can dismay

The hope no disappointments tire

The passion that will burn like fire,

Let me not sink to be a clod;

Make me Thy fuel, Flame of God.

-Amy Carmichael